As my glazed eyes search the jigsaw puzzle of scars within, I begin to see the picture God is confronting me with. The wounds within still bleed.

I blame Him for the pain and cry out for Him to stop. But for Him to comply would be to deny His very love for me.

Until you begin treating your relationship with God as a lover pursuing a lover, the hole in your heart yearning for quick fixes will remain.

“Hit me instead.” My older brother’s voice trembles as he stands between my mother and the crying misery that is me.